Bumps for Boomers or…
You can’t ski the bumps if you’ve got Junk in the Trunk
You can’t ski the bumps if you’ve got Junk in the Trunk
People tend to have pretty strong feelings about skiing bumps; they either love em or hate em. I personally have a love/hate relationship with moguls. I love them when the sun is out and they are medium sized and friendly. I hate them when the light is flat, they are big and icy, and they make me fall down. Just sayin.
If you are healthy and your age ends in “teen” and you want to ski moguls, just go straight down the zipper line, absorbing the impacts as your youthful, rubberish knees pump up and down like a politician’s lips in November. Those of you in this category can stop reading now. That’s all there is to it. For the rest of us… we need a better plan.
The plan includes three key elements: speed control, line selection and positive attitude.
Speed control is paramount. Most aspiring bump skiers are fine for their first two or three turns. It’s that fourth turn, as they are accelerating through Mach 2, where they blow up and it’s “yard sale” time, or worse.
To learn speed control, start on a groomed intermediate slope and make a series of Uphill Christies, coming to a complete stop after each one. Start skiing straight down the hill, then make a firm, assertive turn across the fall line ending up with your ski tips pointing slightly up hill. I’m not talking hockey stop here. I’m looking for a round “C” shaped turn accomplished by aggressively rotating BOTH feet, but with one VERY key caveat. Although your skis will be pointing slightly uphill at the end of this turn, I want your body, from your hip sockets up, to be pointing downhill , with your downhill pole extended right down the fall line, ready to start the next turn. (See Photo below). I’m looking for a three point landing here ; two equally edged skis and one pole plant all happening at the same time. This will keep you centered and out of the back seat. This is CRITICAL because you can’t ski moguls successfully with your weight on your heels. (See the sub-title of this article :-)
“Downhill Christie” linking Uphill Christies on the Backside of Sugarloaf. Check out her upper body position and aggressive pole touch
If you are healthy and your age ends in “teen” and you want to ski moguls, just go straight down the zipper line, absorbing the impacts as your youthful, rubberish knees pump up and down like a politician’s lips in November. Those of you in this category can stop reading now. That’s all there is to it. For the rest of us… we need a better plan.
The plan includes three key elements: speed control, line selection and positive attitude.
Speed control is paramount. Most aspiring bump skiers are fine for their first two or three turns. It’s that fourth turn, as they are accelerating through Mach 2, where they blow up and it’s “yard sale” time, or worse.
To learn speed control, start on a groomed intermediate slope and make a series of Uphill Christies, coming to a complete stop after each one. Start skiing straight down the hill, then make a firm, assertive turn across the fall line ending up with your ski tips pointing slightly up hill. I’m not talking hockey stop here. I’m looking for a round “C” shaped turn accomplished by aggressively rotating BOTH feet, but with one VERY key caveat. Although your skis will be pointing slightly uphill at the end of this turn, I want your body, from your hip sockets up, to be pointing downhill , with your downhill pole extended right down the fall line, ready to start the next turn. (See Photo below). I’m looking for a three point landing here ; two equally edged skis and one pole plant all happening at the same time. This will keep you centered and out of the back seat. This is CRITICAL because you can’t ski moguls successfully with your weight on your heels. (See the sub-title of this article :-)
“Downhill Christie” linking Uphill Christies on the Backside of Sugarloaf. Check out her upper body position and aggressive pole touch
Do ten Uphill Christies to the left, and then ten of them to the right. Once you’ve conquered these one at a time, link them together in a series of round turns while trying to duplicate that feeling of completion you had in the individual Christies.
Next, move to as steep a pitch as you feel comfortable with. Make these same round, “C” shaped turns, but with the goal in mind that your speed at the end of your tenth turn will be the same as it was after your second. For this to work you will have to FINISH your turns. If your turns are “Z” shaped and your skis don’t make it at least 90 degrees or more across the fall line, this drill will not work and you will soon be going faster than free hors D’oeuvres at a Mangy Moose Happy Hour,( For the record, The Mangy Moose doesn’t have free hors D’oeuvres, I just wish they did.) If you do this drill correctly it may be the slowest you have ever skied down such a steep pitch, but in this case, that’s a good thing.
Ok, so now that you can link round, finished turns down a steep pitch and maintain a consistent slow speed it’s time to head to the bumps. Find a spot with small to medium bumps on a hill where the pitch is only moderate. As you look down the hill you’ll see the snow has been molded into a sea of rounded mounds by skiers turning over and over again in the same places. Here’s where line selection comes in. The most direct line, straight down the fall line, is called the Zipper Line. This path was formed because most of the skiers ahead of you went that way. The problem is that each time a skier takes the same route the moguls get bigger and more importantly the troughs or ruts get deeper and scarier.( See Photo 2)
Next, move to as steep a pitch as you feel comfortable with. Make these same round, “C” shaped turns, but with the goal in mind that your speed at the end of your tenth turn will be the same as it was after your second. For this to work you will have to FINISH your turns. If your turns are “Z” shaped and your skis don’t make it at least 90 degrees or more across the fall line, this drill will not work and you will soon be going faster than free hors D’oeuvres at a Mangy Moose Happy Hour,( For the record, The Mangy Moose doesn’t have free hors D’oeuvres, I just wish they did.) If you do this drill correctly it may be the slowest you have ever skied down such a steep pitch, but in this case, that’s a good thing.
Ok, so now that you can link round, finished turns down a steep pitch and maintain a consistent slow speed it’s time to head to the bumps. Find a spot with small to medium bumps on a hill where the pitch is only moderate. As you look down the hill you’ll see the snow has been molded into a sea of rounded mounds by skiers turning over and over again in the same places. Here’s where line selection comes in. The most direct line, straight down the fall line, is called the Zipper Line. This path was formed because most of the skiers ahead of you went that way. The problem is that each time a skier takes the same route the moguls get bigger and more importantly the troughs or ruts get deeper and scarier.( See Photo 2)
This is a great path to take if your nickname is Gumby and you were born after Clinton left office. Fortunately for the rest of us, whose knees and lower backs are somewhat more fragile these days, there is an easier way.
Look at the photo below. You’ll see two side by side dotted lines. The red one on skier’s right is the Zipper line. Note how deep the ruts are. With any kind of speed, this line will rattle your teeth.The blue line to skier’s left is a much less jarring way to go. It’s called the “Anti Line”.
You are on the anti line if you turn where most people haven’t. You are essentially turning on the tops or sides of the bumps and following the shoulders or bridges between them, scrupulously avoiding the troughs and subsequent visits to the Chiropractor. I’ll admit that this strategy sounds easier than it actually is. Anti lines aren’t as consistent as zipper lines and sometimes they just end. When this happens and you are fairly athletic, you can launch off the top of one bump to avoid the rut that is waiting to devour you. Sometimes however, you’re just gonna have to take one for the team and absorb the shock as you make your way back to smoother pastures.
The fact that this isn’t easy is what makes bump skiing so much fun. Here’s a couple of other tips that will help:
Try to look at least two bumps ahead to choose your path. There will be fewer unpleasant surprises this way.
Be slow and deliberate. It’s even ok to come to almost a complete stop on top of a bump before initiating your next turn with a movement down the hill.
Most importantly, keep your upper body facing downhill at all times with your hands in front where you can see them. End/start each turn with an aggressive pole plant down the fall line usually right on top of a mogul. The above will keep your “junk out of the trunk” and your weight forward where it belongs.
Finally there is the Positive Attitude. If you look down from the top of a bump run and are thinking scary thoughts, scary things are likely to happen. A good friend once told me that if she is feeling intimidated when she looks at a trail full of huge moguls, she just tries to imagine them all in their underwear and then she’s not scared anymore. (Hey it works for public speaking!) Seriously though, you need to feel YOU are in charge, not the bumps. Conquer the smaller bumps on a blue trail before you attempt to tackle a steep Double Black. Wait for a beautiful sunny day when the snow is soft and the bumps are friendly. Take it one turn at a time and as “The Byrds” sang in the late 60’s, “Turn, Turn, Turn”.
And finally, remember, The Mountain is your Friend.